On Thursday mornings I usually try to attend a men’s Bible study group from my church. Each week we study the text for the upcoming Sunday services based on the liturgical calendar. Each week a group leader is designated. The group leader sends out two questions regarding the text, and then we all answer it in our own way and discuss our answers. It’s a great group of guys and we have some outstanding discussions and oftentimes provocative questions.
Today we studies the following text:
“I am the living bread that came down from heaven. If anyone eats of this bread, he will live forever. This bread is my flesh, which I will give for the life of the world.”
Then the Jews began to argue sharply among themselves, “How can this man give us his flesh to eat?”
Jesus said to them, “I tell you the truth, unless you eat the flesh of the Son of Man and drink his blood, you have no life in you. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day. For my flesh and my blood is real drink. Whoever eats my flesh and drinks my blood remains in me, and I in him. Just as the living Father sent me and I live because of the Father, so the one who feeds on me will live because of me. This is the bread that came down from heaven. Your forefathers ate manna and died, but he who feeds on this bread will live forever.” John 6: 51-58.
My pastor, who happened to be the group leader this week, asked this question, “What does Communion mean to you?” Today, I felt the need to publicly answer this question.
In a way, communion is a throwback to the Israelite system of sacrifices. Under Mosaic law, a person who had knowingly sinned, or who sinned and realized it later, would offer a Sin Offering or a Guilt Offering, respectively, in order to atone before God of that sin. This was a spiritual cleansing to purify someone before they could commune with God. They could then, if they chose, offer a Fellowship offering. A Fellowship Offering involved an animal that was sacrificed to God, and then eaten in a communal meal.
In the Middle East, eating with someone was the highest form of relationship with that person. It expressed love and close relationship. I believe that Communion is modeled after that. The difference is that in this case instead of us offering a goat or ram as a sacrifice for our sin, God has offered himself.
This is only an academic background though. This doesn’t give the real significance that I feel that Holy Communion has for me.
Every Sunday, before Communion we go through the confession and absolution. It is a generic confession. We then read the Communion liturgy and bless the bread and wine. I was raised to believe, and do believe, that once we bless the bread and wine, that the bread and wine becomes the true flesh and blood of Jesus Christ. This is my belief, and I understand that there are some denominations that may not agree.
Once the words of institution are pronounced, there is usually some time before the ushers allow me up to the altar to receive the Sacrament of Holy Communion. This is when I use my time to make my own specific confession.
I think of all the thoughts that I shouldn’t have had, but did. I think of all the things I shouldn’t have said but did anyway, as well as all the things I should have said but didn’t. I think of all the things I shouldn’t have done, but did. I think of all the things I should have done, but didn’t. I confess all these things. It is humbling, and to be frank, I feel disgusted and ashamed of myself.
But then, the usher taps my shoulder and it’s time to go up to the altar to receive communion. And the one thing I focus on is that I am receiving the true body and true blood of Christ. God is manifest and physically present, here and now, with me regardless of my sins. Despite my sin, He allows me into His presence, in fact invites me to be in His presence. The body and blood that He has shed washes away my sins, and He communes with me. He communes with all of the believers with me at the altar. He communes with all of the believers through all the centuries that have accepted His grace. It is overwhelming to me. It puts tears in my eyes. Right or wrong, that is what Holy Communion means to me.
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